Friday, August 26, 2011

Shit Show

It has come to my attention that many people over the age of hmm....40, don't know the phrase "shit show" and what that means.

For example, after explaining, in one sentence, the evening events of my 10 year high school reunion to Phil (my FIL - father in law) he was a bit perplexed. "Shit show?" said he. "Shit show, yes," I explained.

So, after explaining to him what exactly that entailed, I would like to inform all the readers out there exactly what those words mean. It really is a great phrase that wraps up a lot into two little words.

Okay, "shit show" is a descriptive term to explain how a situation became/was frantic or ridiculous. For example, let's say you start out an evening eating dinner, having a lovely time and then, BAM, the waitress spills a full bowl of soup on your dress. After you get semi-cleaned, an old chum finds you and tells/yells at you all about his/her new life as a divorcee. Then, you decide to leave only to realize your car won't start and your dog shit in the back seat (although, no shit actually has to occur for it to be labeled as "shit show). You get home just ready to crash into bed but alas, your cat pissed all over the bed because, well, who f-ing knows (it isn't a urinary tract infection). *Or if you are an actual adult that doesn't just own animals, let's say your babysitter didn't actually put the kids to bed and they built a fort blocking the entire hallway to your bedroom.* So instead of sleeping in bed (because it either has piss on it or you are too exhausted to find the way in after putting the little shits to bed), you just open a sleeping bag and fall asleep. (The individual events in this story may, or may not, be things that actually happened in my life.) 

The next morning, you would call your sister and she would ask how your date night went. You would sigh and say, "It was definitely a shit show." You could then proceed to explain all the events or she would just know that it was exhausting and probably slightly funny.

Shit shows are usually something you end up laughing about though because they are so ridiculous and you feel so overwhelmed that you don't know what else to do.

They have happened a lot in our household: here, here, here, and here.

Hopefully you experienced at least 10 shit shows in your lifetime. While they are annoying, they provide good stories and remind you that, well, shit happens.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Summer Tacos

Since becoming gluten sensitive, I have had to re-vamp some old recipes and use new ingredients in my cooking. Something that I am in LOVE with right this second are corn tortillas. I never really liked them before but for some reason now, I crave them. A fresh, homemade taco with sour cream, salsa (even homemade tomatillo salsa!), beans and some lime sound amazing to me. I make this at least once a week. You should too.

Summer Tacos
created by Emily Marrs
makes 6 corn tortilla sized tacos 

- 2T extra virgin olive oil
- 3 cloves of garlic minced
- 1 medium sized onion chopped
- 1 can of black beans (or 3/4c of dried beans, soaked and cooked)
- 1 small zucchini sliced
- 1 small summer squash sliced
- 2 cups of cabbage, shredded
- 1 stem of oregano, leaves stripped and cut roughly
- handful of cilantro chopped
- 1 lime
- 1 carrot, shredded
- salsa and/or hot sauce
- package of corn tortillas or taco shells

1. Begin heating a large saute pan. Add a pinch of salt to the bottom of the pan.
2. When pan is warm, add olive oil.
3. After about 20 seconds (before olive oil begins smoking), add minced garlic and chopped onion to pan.
4. Saute until onion is semi-soft and translucent.
5. Add zucchini and squash. Saute until soft, about 4 minutes.
6. Add carrots and kale. Saute for 3 minutes, until kale begins to wilt.
7. Season with salt and pepper.
8. Add beans (or meat), cabbage, and oregano. Squeeze the juice of one lime on top of ingredients in pan. Saute for 5 minutes.
9. Give the dish a taste and season with salt and pepper if more is needed. If you have agave, about a teaspoon is great in this dish!
10. When the saute is done. Warm your tortillas in another pan until soft.
 11. When all your tortillas are ready, take out and add your saute on top with some fresh cilantro, freshly shredded carrots, hot sauce/salsa, cheese, and any other fresh toppings you like on tacos. I love sour cream.
12. Fold and enjoy!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Something Blue

This past weekend was beautiful Sissy's wedding and my one year wedding anniversary. (They were not on the same day. They were one day apart but that didn't stop Little Bear (bro-in-law) to ask what we were doing for our anniversaries next year.)

Mr Pepperworth and I wanted to celebrate our anniversary somehow. Really that just meant we would go to dinner (something we try not to do often). Our plan was to get off the island where Sissy and Little Bear's wedding was held, go to dinner, and relax. All fine and dandy.

Well, it really wasn't all fine and dandy. You know why? Because I forgot to wear blue on my wedding. I had a blue addition but never put it on, I forgot. Hopefully this only jinxed the first year anniversary. It was a dousy. Let me tell you about it.

Sunday August 14:
9a- Mr Pepperworth and I roll out of bed. I realize we have to make an "after-wedding brunch" at 10a and probably have to pack and figure out how to use a fucking ferry. We showered and got packed pretty fast. I try to call the ferry people to find out what the situation is for the day but my phone keeps roaming because it thinks I am in flipping Canada.
10a - Guy on the phone says noon ferry still isn't full. We are safe, or so we thought.
10:15a - On to brunch we go.
11:30a - Little Bear's brother (a ferry captain) says he is going to put his car in line for the 2p ferry. We figure we should do the same but after trying to figure out details we leave about 5 minutes after him.
11:50a-12:30p - Mr Pepperworth gets in line for the ferry and does all the things you have to do in said line.
12:45p - Mr Pepperworth arrives back at brunch.
1p - We head back to our car afraid we won't make it on the ferry. Ferry comes and it looks like we might get on.
2:17p - We move up in line. All our other friends who left the same time as us get on. The ferry is pretty full. The ferry guy shows "5" on his hand, we are the 5th car. We get excited.
2:19p - Ferry guy gives the "stop" sign to the car 3 cars in front of us. Fuck! We didn't make it. Next ferry arrives at 5:30p. Luckily my loving Daddums and Mother waited for us and we decide to go with them and leave our car. (I love them.) We are going to go to the state park and get a snack. We get a snack, I feel sick. Too much car. I get a headache. Emily with headache = bitch.
4:10p - 20 minute rest in parent's hotel room.
4:45p - Back in line for ferry. Obviously, we get right on. Mr Pepperworth falls asleep. I go find some family friends that are on the same ferry who I never see. We have a good time on the ferry.
6:15p - We get back to the main land and decide to eat. I remember this taqueria I ate at with some college roomies. $22 later we have a fabulous meal actually.
8p - We get home. Thank the lord all mighty.
8:05p - Start unloading.
8:15p - Realize cat barf on the floor. Clean up cat barf.
8:30p - Realize cat pee all over bed comforter. Clean comforter but in the process the laundry overflows.
8:50p - Realize cat is super sick and clear liquid is coming out of his anus.
9:00p - Feel like crying when I have to decide whether to sleep in sleeping bags or in old sheets and thin ass comforter.
9:20p - Realize my husband wants to cry.
9:30p - Say, fuck this. Put the cat in a room with a litter box so he can shoot clear liquid out of his butt in that and not on the bed or dog bed.
9:45p - Take a shower. It is a cold shower because I was last and the overflowing laundry machine used too much hot water. At this point, I just laugh. I can't believe this is the end of the day!

10p - Realize this all happened because I didn't wear something blue.

Good thing I gave Sissy one of my blue silly bands to wear on her wedding so she won't have to go through this next year.

Oh yeah, and good thing I love my husband so freakin' much otherwise I might take this as a sign our marriage ain't gonna go so well. But I am sure it was just the one day.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

The Porch Swing

After coming home from a productive day at work and only feeling the need to wring one or two necks on the job, I was feeling pretty good. So good in fact I canned some bread & butter pickles, fermented dill pickles, made gluten free zucchini bread, made dinner, and sat down to write this post. Today was good.

But you know what ended up making it great? The Porch Swing.

Now, when I think of a porch swing I think: relaxing, inviting, comforting, and so on and so forth. This is exactly what I am about to introduce but it isn't that swing on your front porch. Oh no, this is a drank. A perfect summer drank.

The Porch Swing came to my attention last summer courtesy of Smitten Kitchen. It screams summer and is so refreshing. What isn't to like? Pimms, great, even if you aren't English. Gin, sippin' on it. Lemonade, oh god. Cucumber? Y.E.S.

So if you need an evening siparoo, pull this concoction together, you won't be sorry.

Porch Swing
adapted from

1 part Gin
1 part Pimms
4 parts lemonade (a good one, like newton's)
some cucumber slices
nice amount of ice

Mix her all together and don't have too many. Plus, don't drink and drive. You shouldn't be anyway though, you just got home from work. You need rest.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

What the Farmer Doesn't Tell You

As you may well know, we went to our first Farmer's Market last Saturday. (actually it was a Public Market, hence why it didn't go so well.)

As you may have well guessed from that last sentence, the Public Market was a hoppin' but not so much money was made. Let's just say it is a really good thing both Mr Pepperworth and I have our full time day jobs. We made back about a 1/5th of the cost of the damn tent we had to buy but really, I can't complain too much, it wasn't all bad.

Our first Market sale ever.

Okay, it was that bad money-wise but fun-wise, it was pretty darn good. Mr Pepperworth and I spent Thursday and Friday prepping ourselves, saying, "do you want the bad news or the good news first," and things of that nature. We had to figure out what we had, how much we would need to take and it was actually all very exciting trying to guess how many customers we would have and what they would buy.

We got to the Market at 7:30am, first ones there, whoop whoop! Then had to wait around until someone could tell us what to do. We set up and totally had the best looking booth. Cute, inviting, and better than the plastic tubs other people were using.

Alas, for our first week we didn't get the attendance we were hoping for. In this one horse town people don't seem to actually go to the Public Market to buy food. Hopefully by pulling through we will get people to go for that purpose. We do have some great things but most people don't know that baby beets and purple kale can be made into some smashing, awesome stirfrys. Eat that for dinner, not your veal parmesan TV meal. I held my tongue though and didn't tell anyone they could loose a few lbs with more veggies in their diet.

We had fun. We met some great people and hope to really help Ferndale grow their local food movement. They need farmers and I must stick by Mr Pepperworth as the Farmer's Wife. I pretty much am the best Farmer's Wife and have to live by my name now! Plus, I make the signs look pretty damn good. I even put one of our engagement photos on a bulletin board. Everybody thought it was pretty cool.

Unfortunately, we won't be at the Market for a couple of weekends because 1) we took everything we had the first week. It is a hard "summer", throw us a bone now. 2) my baby sister is gettin' a married. Can't wait to get back though and establish ourselves a bit better. Plus, when those cantaloupe and melons come out, ain't nobody gonna pass us up. Oh lord, please let them like melons.